‚ÄčAn Australian Creative Director and Strategist fumbles through life in America. Live from New York.

An Australian Creative Director and Strategist fumbles through life New York City.

god damn idiot.

A few months ago, I purchased a shirt from Zara in Hong Kong airport on my way back to Sydney. After trying on the medium and the small, I went for the small: and so began a saga of me being a total fucking idiot.

I arrived in Sydney, and on Saturday night out decided to wear the new shirt. However, upon putting it on, it felt a little snug: however, if I stood still, I liked how it looked, so I wore it out (because I was OBVIOUSLY going to stand dead still all night).

About 8 minutes after leaving the house (juuuuust two far away to head home and change) it dawned on me that a) I was completely uncomfortable and b) I looked less cool than I thought. I then proceeded to twitch, jerk and basically inform everyone within sight that i was uncomfortable, and wanted to change. Luckily my sister brought me a T-Shirt, and all was well - I vowed to never wear the shirt again. However, being my mother’s son, I couldn’t bring myself to throw it out.

Skip forward 6 weeks.

After a delightful bought of gastro, I was getting dressed for work this morning and saw the shirt. Feeling slim (GOODBYE WATER WEIGHT), I put it on: and once again was sucked into it’s slimming charms.

Once again, I was wrong. After yet another uncomfortable day in the shirt, I gave in and went to Zara to buy a tee, and am now waiting for my co-workers to return to the office from lunch, and mock me.

I am a god damn idiot.